Oh.

Basically, here is what happened since I posted last:
(you might want to read that, first)
I talked to Hunter.

Me: "Hey... I think we should break up."
Hunter: "What?"
Me: "I don't really think it's working out. I don't think that I can BE in a relationship."
Hunter: "Oh. Why?" fucking awkward.
Me: "I don't think there's any chemistry between us. Don't get me wrong. I love you, so much, but as a person. That's why I stayed in this relationship for so long, er... um... what was long for me. Because I care about you so much and I wanted this to work out so badly."
Hunter: "I understand."
blahblahblah
yaddayaddayadda
(saving you from more awkward conversation... which I don't exactly remember)
Hunter: "Wait... Does this have anything to do with... you know, that thing we discussed the other day? the feeling up"
Me: "No, not at all."
Hunter: "Because I don't even know what that was."
Me: "It's alright. It happens. I promise, this has nothing to do with it. I just... don't think this was really working. And I hate this, because I really want to stay friends, but I don't feel like we CAN stay friends after this and... I don't know."
blahyaddablah
Hunter: "So I think our main problem was the age difference. Because I'm a sophomore and you're a freshman, we never got to see each other." NO!
Me: "Yeah..." what do I say? "No, I just don't like you in that way"? I'm not that much of a bitch.
Hunter: "So, do you want to hang out for a bit?"
Me: "Sure."
We walked to the student activities center and watched TV for a bit. Then I walked with him to our school box office so he could get a ticket for the play tonight. We half hugged, and I walked off. I thought that he had taken this extremely well, and (I know this is selfish) I was actually kind of pissed off that he didn't care that much. I promptly went to the internet cafe next to the grill and logged on to Facebook to cancel our relationship. I'm obsessive like that. Relatively good ending.

Right?
Wrong.

So I'm hanging out with the group of friends who DIDN'T go to New York this weekend (don't even get me started on this) when I get this text from Monica.
"HUNTER IS CRYING"
I immediately responded with something along the lines of "how do you know?"
"Hey, it's (insert other friend's name), but ya he's so upset. hahahahahahahahah hehehehehehehe so happy week. I kinda feel bad but whatevs"
I feel sick to my stomach.

I got the full details after eating a stomachfull of carrot spice cake. Bundt cake, to be exact.

Basically, during the show he had his hands over his eyes and was wiping with his shirt. The full nine yards. During intermission, my friends talked to one of his friends and she asked them why he was so upset. "He won't talk to anyone. He's been like this all afternoon. What happened?"

Oh.


Part of me wants to slap him for being so affected by this, part of me wants to take it all back so he doesn't have to suffer, part of me is relieved that I'm no longer with a guy who would cry after... this, part of me feels like a complete and total bitch.

I'm going to New Haven tomorrow.
Hopefully that will take my mind off of things.